i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
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