he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
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