so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
