I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
