First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize