I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
