Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
