ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
