i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
there was a trapeze. enough said
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Randomize