Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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