Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize