careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Randomize
