if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
