eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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