he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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