I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
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