around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You called me 32 times last night just to tell me you felt a heartbeat in your vagina?
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize