So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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