She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize