You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize