the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
