So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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