I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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