You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
