Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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