Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I think this hangover is going to kill me. If it succeeds I would like you to read a dramatic rendition of 'Trapped in the closet' complete with interpretative dance at my funeral.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
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