Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize