I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
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