I can tuck mytits in my pants
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
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