At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
