I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Randomize
