Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
