whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Randomize
