guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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