Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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