I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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