How'd it feel making her break her religion?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Enjoy the penises
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
