Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
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