just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize