I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
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