I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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