Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
