I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Randomize
