Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
