1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Randomize
