so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
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