How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
