My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Drake has all the answers
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize
