Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
The air was thick with penises
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
