Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
