I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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